Dear Dan Schachner,
Since this year’s Super Bowl was such a blow-out I found myself watching more of the Puppy Bowl than I would like to admit. You are the (human) face of the Puppy Bowl and literally get paid to play with puppies. I was tempted to click over to the first annual Kitten Bowl but I stayed true to the original and cutest Super Bowl alternative program. I always was a dog person anyways. Now that there’s a similar program competing for the remaining 30% of the America TV audience, I think you have some leverage man. Would you turn your back on the Puppy Bowl for a better offer from the Kitten Bowl?
I read that representatives from the American Society for Animal Cruelty are the real referees of the Puppy Bowl. Don’t accidentally sit on one of the pups or they might throw your ass in jail. Even worse they would cancel the Puppy Bowl forever so please be careful.
Apparently it was recorded months ago, so I hope you enjoyed your Super Bowl Sunday.
PS: Is there a winner?